Beautiful Dirty Rich

Download that.

So much to say.

1stly, so sorry i haven't been here everyday! ish is hard.

ok so mad new ish goin on

I gotta tell u later...

while u wait, down load Christmas tree by lady gaga... its mad cool 

my heart actually raced when you signed on.

WTF!


I really can't believe how excited I got when he signed on. I actually gasped.

He screws me over daily yet I still love him. Yea I admit it, I love him.

Fucking rediculous.

I was talking and he wasn't responding. He sends his phone number and signs off. And just to be mysterious, he doesn't answer.

I really wish he didn't do this to me. I can't take the minor heart attacks.

All bad things can't wait to begin

Today was good.

I was smiling which is new for me.

I am more excited than ever to go to college.

May have met my roommate.

May have met my new best friend.

I honestly couldn't care less about the next four months of my life... OD meaningless


As my title says... all bad thing can't wait to begin... or keep going

Though my buttons keep being pushed... i remain calm.


I'm so glad i'm going to HOWARDu!

fuck hampton

HU fam is live!

like a child thats lost at 7.

Song representing my mood: "Walked Out of Heaven"-Jagged Edge

I'm mad lonely. madmadmad lonely.
It's getting warmer, and when it's warm, I always feel like I need a summer love.

"I can't wait to fall in love with you
You can't wait to fall in love with me"

I'm in the mood for a serious relationship. Like realll serious one. One that won't end because of a lil cheating or one fight. A marriage type deal.

Problems:
1. The boyfriend store is closed due to the recession.
2. 4months til I'm gone
3. Too busy to pee, much more worry about a boyfriend.

Solutions:
1. Leave your [2cents] below cuz I'm drawing a blank.

Sometimes I wish you could google solutions to life's issues. Like I could type in "why am I feeling sucky"? And it would give me a wiki page with the answer and a solution.

I've been so bad in the boy department lately that I even let my one male best friend go.

I gotta fix this. Brb.

-sage.BLAIZE

love; the crooked way, college; the boring way, competing; the Q-U-A-D way.

i, honest to blog, think that heterosexual love is so frivolous.

the "gays" got it down. there relationships seem so real to me.

maybe its because they are more in tune with each other's needs; 

on another note

my future is fast [slow] approaching.

fast in that; its ONLY 4 months away:: so much planning!

slow in that its 4 MONTHS away!:: so much waiting

college seems less like a fantasy and more like a reality as the days move forward.

instead of thinking about the fun i'm going to have,

i'm thinking about what needs to be done before i get there.

the "boring part " of the college process, after the application process, but before actual classes.

stillthereis EXCITEMENT.

on the last note

my predecessors[hopefully], the 08-09 quad girls did a fantastic job during the resfest at howard.

they didn't win the competition [BOO annex], but they won my respect and love.

those girls were dedicated and had a finesse-filled swag unlike any others.

madfly.madfly. [ily stassi X]

-sage.BLAIZE

making this a shower type thing

Let's see if I can make a post daily...

So as for today, I purchased some very expensive pants and I am seriously regretting it... Kinda.

I hate drama soo much and sometimes I wish I could be open about how I'm feeling with EVERYONE. Life would be so much easier, if we didn't have to worry about how someone else might feel, what problems you may start, whose life may constantly SUCK afterward. Trust, I know the truth hurts, but when I hear it, the process of getting over it is so much faster.

Something I am also noticing about myself; I make compromises that end up with me feeling exactly the same as I did before. There are times when I make it my mission to change the relationship I have with someone and when I confront them, I leave the table with a lot less than my cards were worth. I'll take whatever they're willing to give me just to end the awkwardness of bringing up the "taboo" and the "dirty laundry." Let's do like Power 105 and put it on blast.

I want to make a vow, to always be completely truthful, (in the nicest way, of course) to stop putting up with certain things just to keep the peace; fuck the peace. I want people to be able to say "Ash always let's me know what's on her mind, she always speaks the truth."

The boys aren't gonna stop playing their game if you don't call them out on their fouls and techs... Its up to us to be the refs.

-SAGE.blaize.

it's my life, and i believe it dont affect nobody else but me

I had a fun thing, then I didn't. I "have" a best friend,but I don't want him. I want someone to be my own and I feel like he's hiding behind a great excuse. Maybe I'm not his type, maybe he really doesn't wanna screw his friend over: that ship has sailed anyway.
I noticed that he's something like a womanizer. Gives every girl their week until he gets what he wants (or the most he can get) and moves to the next. Kinda like a train; next stop, 125th girl. Boy do you feel special when he's at your stop. But soon enough he starts running express and passes right by your local stop.
I told myself I wouldn't fall for that charm, the smile, and those dimples, but come on, I'm 17, meaning hormonal and horny smh.
If you can't be with me alone, then we can't do the "only if we're exclusive" stuff. Your friend 400 miles away can't be your only excuse. And if he is, call me when you're are older than your shoe size.
So, with that being said, I'm ending it before it can even get too deep. Sooo tired of the immaturity, the hiding, the fronting, and the faking.
And the worst part about it is that they will always be immature...